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SGA Fic: Contemplation (1/1)

Title: Contemplation
Author: MurdocsAngel
Rating: Teen
Spoilers: Intruder
Pairing: Zelenka/Weir friendship/UST
Summary: An episode tag to “Intruder”.
Disclaimer: I don’t own ‘em.

A/N: Well, this is my first serious fic for this pairing. And it still isn’t exactly a pairing. Hope you guys enjoy!

She hugged herself tightly as she sat on one of the lower balconies of Atlantis, looking out across the calm, moonlit sea, her eyes not seeing anything as a chill breeze ruffled the curls of her hair. The rhythmic lapping of the waves soothed her conflicting thoughts, and she slowly relaxed under the therapeutic sound.

For so long, she had been wanting to return home, thinking that it was on Earth, but in the month she’d been there all she could do was remember moments like these during the hours when her troubled nightmares sent her out looking for relief.

Even now, though Simon wasn’t there, she didn’t feel as if she were missing anything, which caused a slight feeling of guilt. He had made his choice, and she didn’t blame him. Only, in a way she did. He couldn’t have told her he was involved the moment she came back? Couldn’t have simply thrown her things out, even refused to speak with her, rather than let her go on believing there was a chance they could be together, that he might go to Atlantis?

She sighed and closed her eyes, turning her face towards the breeze, enjoying the cool feeling as hot tears trickled down her cheeks. She wasn’t certain if she was crying for what had been lost, or simply because she knew that she didn’t really miss it; she only knew that it felt good to release the pent-up emotions that had been building within her since that fateful moment when he’d told her he was seeing someone else.

“Dr. Weir?”

The voice was so soft, she almost didn’t hear it, but perhaps some subconscious part of her wanted the interruption. She surreptitiously wiped the tears away and turned to face the man who had spoken and forced a smile to her face.

“Dr. Zelenka,” she greeted, “What can I do for you?”

The Czech regarded her seriously for a moment, a slight flush to his cheeks—as though he were embarrassed to have caught her in her moment of weakness—before speaking again. “I was looking to see if you had time to go over those reports. But I can see you are busy so I will return later…” his voice trailed off and he turned to leave.

She stopped him with a hand on his arm. “I’m not busy. I was just…having a little moment.”

He faced her again, that serious look in his blue eyes. “If you need someone to speak with…”

Something in his voice, in his face, or simply the fact that he was there caused the flood gates to open, and before she knew it she was in his arms blabbering the whole thing.

“And I still don’t know whether I’m glad or not,” she finished, “That Simon didn’t come. That’s the worst part of it, you see?”

“I do see,” he told her, giving her back an awkward pat, “You feel that you are not being true to feelings you have for this man. But perhaps, you are more upset that your feelings were not as strong as you believed them to be?”

“Maybe so,” she agreed, laying her head on his shoulder, taking this one moment to allow herself to be comforted, to be not a leader who had to be strong, even in the face of personal crises, but just a person who needed someone to lean on.

They stood there like that for some time, his steady breathing soothing her in a way that even the ocean was incapable of, before she pulled away and looked up at him. Something akin to disappointment, regret, flashed across his face, but was gone in a second.

“We should get back to work,” she told him. Then, because she was feeling things that she shouldn’t be feeling, but that she was glad for at the moment added, “Thank you.”

He gave a quick smile. “You are welcome.”

The End.

M.A.