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Happiness

I've noticed a trend in my journal entries, and I'm not going to break it. One minute I'm happy as a lark, and next I'm down in the gutters with the rats, moaning about how horrible my life is. It's actually kind of fun, like being on a roller coaster of emotions that never ends.

It does cause some physical discomfort, headaches and sour stomach, but generally only when I also haven't either slept or eaten anything.

Oh, and I'm drinking coffee. I am not a coffee drinker; I prefer tea. However, this is special coffee. It's made like regular coffee, and then, instead of putting cream/milk and sugar in it, I stir in a packet of instant cocoa. It's devine. So bittersweet. Much more so than café au lait. It's the perfect blend...

Now, if only the extra burst in energy it gives me could be used towards writing. I've got so many ideas for several different fics, as well the original stuff I'm planning. Unfortunately, the energy it gives me is more a physical than mental kind, therefore it's not really useful to me.

I get more energy after staying up way longer than I should. My mind gets into this strange state of awareness, and everything I know can be taken from my head and put into words. I once wrote a thousand word fic in fifteen minutes that way.

Tonight, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to stay up, no matter what, and write! Write as if my life depended upon it!

It kind of does, doesn't it?

Hm.

Coffee with instant hot chocolate is really good, did you know that?

Oh yeah, I already said that. Hm.

A werewolf detective would be interesting, wouldn't it? I think so. I had a weird experience today in my car. I came out from the store, got inside, buckled up, put the keys in the ignition, and had a daydream. I mean, it was almost like I had fallen asleep, except that I was aware of the car around me and the warmth of the sunshine.

And the daydream was detailed, like any daydream should be. Except that it flowed in the odd way that sleeping dreams do, not really logically. For instance, I lived in San Francisco, and I have never considered moving to San Francisco.

I also had a room mate in this dream, no idea what they looked like or if they were male or female, and I've never wanted a roomie. They'd kill me in the first twenty minutes.

Anyway, they were amateur engineers or something, because they had half finished robots and other electronic goodies littering the place. Maybe they were video game desginers on the side. That part wasn't very clear to me.

I do know what I was doing. I was writing. A short story collection about a werewolf detective named Jeffery Beaumont.

I think I might actually have got some plot ideas from this daydream, had someone honking at another person coming out of the store, not blared their horn in my ear, making me lose the vision.

It was neat while it lasted though.

Well, that's all I've got for now. Must return to my chocolate coffee. I did mention it was ambrosia, right?

M.A.