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>
> At last a guy has taken the time to write this all
> down. Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must
> admit, it's pretty good.)
> We always hear "the rules" from the female point
> of view...
> Now here are the rules from the male side.
> These are our rules!
> Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON
> PURPOSE!
>
> 1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
>
> 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl.
> If it's up, put it down.
> We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us
> complaining about you leaving it down.
>
> 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the
> changing of the tides. Let it be.
>
> 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never
> going to think of it that way.
>
> 1. Crying is blackmail.
>
> 1. Ask for what you want.
> Let us be clear on this one:
> Subtle hints do not work!
> Strong hints do not work!
> Obvious hints do not work!
> Just say it!
>
> 1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to
> almost every question.
>
> 1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help
> solving it. That's what we do.
> Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
>
> 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
> See a doctor.
>
> 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in
> an argument.
> In fact, all comments become null and void after 7
> Days.
>
> 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret
> girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
>
>
> 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't
> ask us.
>
> 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
> and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we
> meant the other one.
>
> 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us
> how
> you want! it done. Not both.
> If you already know best how to do it, just do it
> yourself.
>
> 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have
> to say during commercials.
>
> 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and
> neither do we.
>
> 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows
> default settings.
> Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color.
> Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve
> is.
>
> 1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
>
> 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
> We will act like nothing's wrong.
> We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
> hassle.
>
> 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer
> to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
>
> 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything
> you wear Is fine...Really.
>
> 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you
> are prepared to discuss such topics! as baseball,
> the shotgun formation, orgolf.
>
> 1.. You have enough clothes.
>
> 1. You have too many shoes.
>
> 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
>
> 1. Thank you for reading this.
>
> Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
>
> But did you know men really don't mind that? It's
> like camping.
> Pass this to as man! y men as you can - to give them
> a laugh.
> Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them
> a bigger laugh!

Comments

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
lorellipsis
Feb. 23rd, 2006 04:11 pm (UTC)
That's funny! And probably all very true...
weirfan
Feb. 27th, 2006 07:15 am (UTC)
Lol, that's just funny, thanks for sharing.:)
victoriaely
Feb. 28th, 2006 11:54 pm (UTC)
You should have warned us: "don't eat/drink while reading this." Now my yogurt is um... not so comfortable.

Very funny :)
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )