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I wrote a fic out of boredom...

It's really just nonsense, so...you can skip it...ignore it...whatever..I was just...bored...and...yeah...

Title: MA on Atlantis? or God Help us All
Author: MurdocsAngel
Pairing: Um...? Read to see?
Rating: Not very sure...teen at the very least
Summary: Okay, so I was bored...and...everybody else gets to do a Mary Sue fic!
Warning: I have not yet written the fic as I type this, so who knows what'll pop up in there. I'm insane...that should be plenty for you people to know. Repeat after me: Do not read insanity if you don't think you can handle it...

Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis is not a possession of mine, and this fic is in no way intended to step on anyone's toes. Mostly it's just because I'M BORED!!!!!!!!!

A/N: Did I mention I was bored? Also, this may seem similar to other stories of this particular genre, but this one is totally…um…off kilter, bonkers…not sane. So. Yeah.

Sitting around feeling sorry for oneself isn't a very interesting past time. In fact, doing so can cause a major headache, specifically right between the eyes. Do sinus' correlate to depression? In any case, I had decided to quit bemoaning the sorry state my life was in, and found myself completely and incredibly bored.

I could have turned the computer on and sat staring at the screen while I tried to see if I could write something, or if I could come up with more pretty pictures like the one I've made for this very group (shameless plugging, but hey, that's what this fic is all about), however, the point of boredom, is that you've already tried everything you've done before. It no longer takes the edge off, engages the mind, whatever you want to call it.

I wonder if this is how Sherlock Holmes felt when there were no cases of significant interest for his great mind to solve. Not that I am in any way, shape or form as brilliant as that man, but hey, I was bored.

All literary references aside, boredom can do strange things to a person. It can make you sit and stare at a wall while you twiddle your thumbs; it can let your mind be overrun with plot bunnies that will never see the light of day; it can even make you witness things that aren't really there.

At least, at the time I thought it wasn't really there. Looking back, I realize that my logical mind had simply taken a leave of absense, and I was no longer 'rational'. For those of you who don't know, despite the fact that I can be a little...out there, I am surprisingly well grounded. My head may be in the clouds, but my feet are firmly planted on the dirt, floor, whatever surface they're supposed to be walking upon.

I have always known the difference between reality and fantasy, and that is perhaps the reason I'm able to play so well in fantasy, because I know that it isn't real.

The rather large purple object in my living room looked real, felt real and even tasted real (don't ask, I obviously wasn't in my right frame of mind), and yet I know that it couldn't be real. Rather large purple objects do not just appear in the middle of your living room, floating in mid-air. They just don't.

So you can understand my obvious confusion, and dismay over the proof that I had finally taken that final turn round the bend; that I was completely and fully insane.

Now, I could have gone right back to what started my boredom in the first place--feeling sorry for myself and the state of my life--but I was more intrigued than anything else. Nothing had really changed from the last time I went on a self-pity spree (about a year ago), and so I couldn't quite figure out what could have made me have this quite realistic hallucination. Had my need for something intellectually stimulating--or at least different from what I had been doing--triggered this?

At least it wasn't a manifestation of David Nykl/Radek Zelenka, whom I have affectionately nicknamed Squishy (SQUISHY!!!!!!! Ahem, sorry, that part of me always gets out somehow whenever the 's' word is mentioned...). I think I may have gone running back to my room and gone to sleep, hoping I was having a dream rather than having my curiosity peaked.

At the time though, Squishy was as far from my thoughts as anything else having to do with Stargate, despite the fact that the floating purple...thing...was so obviously the stuff science fiction is made of. Maybe even Twilight Zone. I don't really like Twilight Zone, but hey, that's not what this fic is about.

Instead, I walked around the object, debating with myself on what it could possibly be. It wasn't amorphous, yet neither did it have a defined shape. It was solid and opaque, and yet I could see through it. This contradiction of my own visual senses piqued my interest further, and I once more reached out to tentatively touch it. The texture was strange, one I’d never felt before. Seriously, I couldn’t describe it if I tried. It wasn’t soft, or hard, or in between…it was just…there.

My curiosity was well engaged by this point, and I put both of my hands on it, memorizing the oddness of it, which may have been stupidity on my part. But well, YOU try not touching something that feels like that, see how you make out. Anyway, the object gave a sort of pulse that I both felt and saw, and then I couldn’t see or feel any more.

I woke to the sound of voices, far off at first, then nearer as my consciousness took over. I’ve never fainted before, so I wasn’t quite certain if this was what it was supposed to feel like or not. As happened when I fell asleep after staying up too late, I was fine while laying down with my eyes closed, but when I opened them and tried to sit up, dizziness and a heavy feeling in my limbs made me lay back and close them again.

Instead of the warm blankets and pillows that I generally surrounded myself with when I went to bed, I found that I was lying on something cold and hard; it really hurts when you hit your head on something like that. With a groan, I began the process of sitting up, first turning on my side; then to my belly, bringing my knees slowly up beneath me, and then pushing up with my arms so that I was on all fours. This feat accomplished, I pushed myself up so that I was in a bipedal position, then fell back, bringing my legs out from under me and sitting with them crossed. I was very proud of myself for that, even though I wondered why I hadn’t just sat straight up. Possibly, a part of my mind had intended for me to stand but…yeah, I was so not ready for that.

Through all of this, you may be wondering, ‘what about those voices you heard?’ Well, as I said, they were far off at first, but nearer as I woke from my impromptu nap; however, while I could still hear them, I couldn’t see anyone, and assumed they were a corridor or so away from my position. Which was in the middle of an Atlantean laboratory.

If I had thought I had lost it earlier, with the whole purple non-object thing, I figured now I was probably sitting in a nice sterile clinic somewhere while people clicked their tongues over the young woman who had gone so completely ‘round the bend, she couldn’t function in normal society any longer.

Either that or I had been dreaming the whole thing, including the purple non-object thing, because I dream weird things like that—and while they make no sense upon waking, in my dreams they make absolutely perfect sense. It was probably my punishment for not finishing my chapter of the round robin over on weirmckayship.

While pondering this—and pondering on how I could be pondering this if I was really insane or dreaming—the voices I heard got really close, like right outside the door close. I was scared. I’m not really an outgoing sort of person, and people coming closer, just…scare me. As the door slid open, and I ducked behind some weird console thingy, I decided I couldn’t be dreaming, because I never got scared when I dreamt. Scared after I woke, sometimes, yes, but never during.

“I am telling you McKay, he had twenty two!”

I instantly recognized the accented voice of my beloved Czech, and had to bite my tongue to keep from squealing. He sounded so exuberant, and I really wanted to see…but my own fear of speaking with strange people kept me right where I was, listening intently to the conversation.

“Twenty-two?” McKay’s voice was just as excited as Squishy’s, “I can’t believe he actually fell for it. I mean, of course he fell for it, it was after all my idea, but twenty two?” There was a smacking sound, which I assumed was Rodney clapping his hands together.

“Yes, vell, you can be the one to tell Dr. Weir why Kavanaugh could not vork because of eating twenty-two power bars with Athosian version laxative,” Radek stated, and I could almost picture him rolling his eyes.

“Now now, no need to be jealous, just because…who are you?”

I jumped and glanced up into Rodney McKay’s blue eyes, knowing mine were wide and frightened. I hadn’t even realized he was walking over here!

“Um…?” I offered, and gave a little shrug, not knowing what to say.


(to be continued…? If that is, anyone actually read past the first nonsensical rambling bit…)


M.A.

Who should find something better to do with her time than imagine purple non-object things appearing in her living room...

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Comments

( 15 comments — Leave a comment )
ladybeth
Apr. 6th, 2005 10:00 pm (UTC)
That made me smile:)

So did the image of Zelenka's face when he finds out you call him Squishy;)
murdocsangel
Apr. 7th, 2005 03:25 pm (UTC)
I'm glad you enjoyed it :) I love making people smile.

O.o, yeah I hadn't quite thought of what Zelenka's reaction would be if he ever finds out I call him Squishy...
ladybeth
Apr. 7th, 2005 03:29 pm (UTC)
I just see him staring at you for awhile as he tries to process the nickname then going "Squishy?"

Also have to wonder if he watched Finding Nemo:)
murdocsangel
Apr. 7th, 2005 03:47 pm (UTC)
Yeah, that could be a problem...in fact, I probably shouldn't have watched it myself...but I just love Disney/Pixar stuff.

I want the soundtrack to Tarzan. Phil Collins...
ladybeth
Apr. 7th, 2005 03:49 pm (UTC)
Now I am reminded that I want the Spirit Soundtrack which has Bryan Adams.
murdocsangel
Apr. 7th, 2005 08:43 pm (UTC)
Spirit was an okay movie. Not sure why I didn't take to it very well...

Shrek and Shrek 2...those were good movies...wonder what would happen if Shrek met Atlantis...

No! No more evil insane plot bunnies! GO AWAY!

M.A.

Who is mad at her gmail account and even madder at ff.net for no reason whatsoever :)
ladybeth
Apr. 7th, 2005 08:53 pm (UTC)
Shrek 3: How Shrek & Donkey kick Wraith Butt...

Ahem. Anyway.

Spirit wasn't my favorite movie of all time but I likde the soundtrack. It is one of those weird things

As for ff.net, half the time everyone's mad at them & Gmail hasn't been too bad lately. Then again I just came from an ordeal with Hotmail and thier evilness.
murdocsangel
Apr. 7th, 2005 09:49 pm (UTC)
Hotmail totally sucks...I can't get the page to load every time, and have often found my inbox full of stuff (important stuff that I've missed!) after a week. So, I moved everything to GMail.

It was working just fine until yesterday, and now I keep getting this error message saying "oops, we can't do what you want, please try again in a few seconds."

"Shrek 3: How Shrek and Donkey Kick Wraith Butt" ROFL!!!!!

Donkey: So, you mean these guys suck out all of your life force and make you all old and grey and stuff? Okay! When do we kick their butts?
ladybeth
Apr. 7th, 2005 10:04 pm (UTC)
Well, I use Outlook Express mostly for my email. Hotmail has decided that it wasn't going to use Outlook anymore unless you bought a paid account. I got lucky because I had an account previous to the change but it still causes me troubles every once and awhile.

G-mail has worked ok so far, but then again I use Outlook Express so it could be different.

Donkey: So, you mean these guys suck out all of your life force and make you all old and grey and stuff? Okay! When do we kick their butts?</>

Rofl! I needed that... I really hate the nights where procrastination catches up with me.


Just got the plot bummy of the team going through the stargate and ending up in Shrek's Swamp.
murdocsangel
Apr. 8th, 2005 01:09 pm (UTC)
LOL!

John looked around, his nose wrinkling as a strange smell hit it. "Please tell me that's not coming from one of us."

"Oh, very funny Sheppard," Rodney snapped, "It's the swamp." His own nose wrinkled in distaste.

"Well, you were the one who..."

"Who what? Come on, you can't just not finish your sentences..." McKay's voice trailed off as well as he read the sign John had seen. "No trespassing, Ogres? Now that's amusing. Look, it even has a picture..."

Um yeah...that just sucked...
ladybeth
Apr. 8th, 2005 05:17 pm (UTC)
LOL..No, it's good. I would add a bit of my own except that Rodney would probably kill me:)

missyvortexdv
Apr. 9th, 2005 06:00 pm (UTC)
go on continues it ;)
And if you're so bored, where's all the mcweir? alien abduction... the journal, what will be will be...? eh, where did all the mcweir go :(
murdocsangel
Apr. 9th, 2005 09:20 pm (UTC)
McWeir is still here in my head...which is the problem. It needs to get out! Seriously, last night I had this dream where Rodney and Liz were wearing a tux and a blue dress (respectively), and they were dancing. However, a couple of flowers walked in and I found myself in a corral with a white jack rabbit before I woke up really really really confused.

Anyway, this particular fic is probably going to have some McWeir in it...just because it is me, and McWeir is what I love best. Squishy's just the icing on the cake ;)

Maybe I should write something about the tux and blue dress thing...something that hasn't been done before...I know! *rubs hands together gleefully* No wait...

*sighs* That's been done. Well, I'll think of something! The plot bunnies never leave me alone long enough for me not to!

If you happen to know of any muses for hire, please let me know.

M.A.
missyvortexdv
Apr. 10th, 2005 07:32 am (UTC)
Aww. sounds cool. looknig forward to more of any of your fics, though some alien abduction wuld be nice.
Maybe you could have the ability to change the SG reality, or your dreams and reality were oddly merging with SG one and causing Mcweir and squishy mayhem, hence everyone wants to get you home :) A crazy idea I know...

murdocsangel
Apr. 10th, 2005 12:53 pm (UTC)
Ah, but crazy is what this fic is...so no idea would be too crazy for it. I like it!

And if I add the whole Shrek thing in there too...nah.

( 15 comments — Leave a comment )